In the winter months, the lack of sun and warmth always seems to chill my soul, making me feel hard and desolate. I find that humor, normally quick, turns to short temper and a feeling of isolation despite being surrounded by family.
During these cold days, my thoughts turn to my mother. When feelings of despair threatened me during our long winters, I used to make a phone call to hear her sweet voice and infinite wisdom. Before the conversation was over, she would leave me feeling once again lighthearted, able to face the cold once again.
This is the second winter after her passing… and I have never missed her more…
My mother was a very special person. She was humble, wise and loved by nearly all that knew her. She had a way of making the sun shine on even the gloomiest of days.
It was impossible to leave her home hungry. She believed in meat, potatoes & gravy, vegetables and bread for nearly every meal – always with second helpings. No one could cook like my mother.
She rarely offered a solution to my problems, but merely by listening and commenting, she seemed to make it diminish. I always felt better after talking to her.
Since I was a small child, I remembered her having medical issues. I would wake up to learn that she was in the hospital and always feared losing her. I knew the day would come when her failing heart would finally give out or one of her many strokes would take her beautiful life… and I knew that I would miss her terribly…
The day came far to quickly… there are no words to describe the pain of missing her…
Cold, bitter winds blot out the sun and warmth… reminding me of the void in my heart… hopelessness sets on my soul… bringing with it despair… loneliness… and pain…
